On January 6, 2021, social media executives at Facebook and Twitter made a decision that changed millions of people’s lives for the better. We speak, of course, of their moves to kick Donald Trump off of their platforms after he incited a violent riot in the hopes of overturning the 2020 election. That’s obviously made it more difficult for Trump to whip his base into a frenzy and cause another attack, but the bans also mean never again having to log into one’s social media accounts terrified to see whatever insane lies and baseless conspiracy theories the 45th president of the United States recently spewed online.
Unfortunately, the bans by Twitter and Facebook did not extend to Trump’s family, and so the world is still forced to endure the deranged rantings of his namesake, Donald Trump Jr., who recently took to Twitter to attack teachers.
Against the backdrop of no fewer than half a dozen guns, the ex-president’s eldest son, who apparently believes himself to be something of a public intellectual, asked his followers: “Guys, what ever happened to ‘follow the science’? ‘Follow the science, that’s what we’re gonna do.’ It seems the Biden administration only follows the science when it actually suits them.” Having ticked off the “malign Joe Biden box,” Don Jr. got down to the real business at hand, telling the camera: “One of things I want to talk about that I’ve been reading a lot about lately is sort of the stuff as it relates to the teachers’ union. You’ve seen what they’ve done over the last couple months, the way they’ve basically held up progress, prevented schools from opening. The teachers’ union and those representing them have definitely failed our children in terms of education and everything else. The teachers’ union has certainly failed the science they’re supposed to be teaching us, ’cause, again, it’s all political.”
Bashing teachers for being worried about a virus that’s killed more than 500,000 people in the U.S., Junior foamed: “Guys, what’s going on? It’s as though they’ll do whatever they can to avoid going back. We saw this back in the day when they held up similar sort of progress to get our kids back to schools.” Then he claimed, like only a man famous for being an idiot could, that teachers have said they don’t like online learning because it’s “not really convenient,” which of course is not at all what teachers have said. Also pissing off Donny, a noted professional fuck-up who probably would’ve been fired years ago were it not for the fact that his boss is his dad? The fact that teachers have the audacity to continue to expect a paycheck for the work they’re doing. “That’s ridiculous,” he said, again, with at least six guns behind him. Explaining the